believing in your breathing.

i'm doing my best not to lose my sense of smell,
but the smoke set my nostrils on fire.
this is exactly the result i was afraid of.
the worthless product of the equation for all the things i desire.
all those things i was warned of in the past come rushing back to me,
good thing i remember them now.
after all the mistakes have been made
looking back on the things i should have done.
i should have spoken slower, chosen words more carefully.
i should have paid attention to the things that actually mattered.
oh what is this life?
what is this mess i've made with the one chance i've been given?
paranoia can overwhelm rather quickly,
this certainly wasn't the way i'd planned things.
i hope that time will tell,
when it whispers in my ear,
whether all of this is normal,
whether everyone feels the fear.
and i hope that you'll be waiting,
and i hope that you'll stay near,
and i hope that you'll be calling back,
when time delivers you back here.